Melissa Charles author

One of the hazards of being an author, other than potentially getting yourself on a list somewhere due to your internet search history (seriously, it’s for a BOOK), is the weird things people say when they discover you’re a writer.

“I would write a book, but I don’t have the time.”

This doesn’t sound like such a bad thing, but trust me when I say this is a case not so much of what is said vs how it’s said. In my experience, the condescension dripping from the tone was thick enough to spread on toast. Somehow, the person managed to imply that not only was I lazy enough to have the time to write, didn’t have anything better to do with my time, and that writing a book was easy.

“I have a fantastic book idea! How about if you write it, and then when it’s published, I’ll make sure to thank you in the acknowledgments?”

Sweetums. Imma gonna hold your hand when I say this, but writing is work. I love it, don’t get me wrong, but I’m not writing anyone’s book for free.

Second, I have so many of my own ideas to write, I may need to become immortal to get them all done.

“I don’t know why you bother with the whole agent and publishing thing. Self-publishing is easier!”

Self-publishing is an absolutely fantastic choice for some authors. It also requires skills I don’t currently possess, and don’t have the spoons to attempt to acquire at this point. I also lack the financial ability to hire the folks who do have those skills.

Plus, I really like my agent. Having a good agent means you’ve got someone in your corner, a support system, that isn’t just about being on sub or negotiating deals. If I need to brainstorm ideas about the plot, get a different perspective, get editorial feedback, my agent is there. For me, that’s invaluable.

Self-publishing isn’t a short-cut. It’s a different path, not an easier path.

“Why bother doing all that work? Just use AI!”

I do not, will not, use AI. Period.

“When are you going to write a real book?“

I’ve personally heard this about writing YA and upper MG novels. Friends who write romance have confided that they’ve heard it too. It seems that if someone doesn’t read *insert genre/age group here* it doesn’t count as a ‘real’ book. Because said person only reads REAL books.

I’ve written novels from upper MG to adult. I write in multiple genres, often blending several into a single novel.

They’re all real books.

“Writing is such a cute hobby!”

Sometimes all I can do is stare at the person, my eye twitching, until I’m gently herded away, usually by the spouse or one of the older Minions. Which is for the best, really.